Focus on what you can control- A wave analogy
Let’s say I wanted to go to the beach one day and I decided to make it my goal to stop the waves from crashing into the shore. Since I am a very determined person, I am going to do everything I can think of all day long, and clearly I am going to have absolutely no effect on the waves and am going to be frustrated and exhausted… likely a very bad day.
Let’s say the next day, I decide I am going to just go to the beach and ignore the waves because yesterday didn’t work. Chances are, I am going to have a much better day.
The obvious moral of this story is… if you try to control something that you can’t control, the only thing you will do is wreck your day at the beach.
- Focus on what you can control- don’t wreck your day at the beach
Although my example is very obvious, no fool would go to the beach to try to stop the waves from crashing into the shore–we do this kind of thing all the time. For example if I was worried about my health, and I went to the doctor and the doctor said I had to take a medical test to make sure I don’t have some big bad disease. Let’s say the doctor says we are going to take the test Monday and will find out the results on Thursday. Chances are very good I am going to spend Monday- Thursday worrying about the results of that test. Well if I get the results on Thursday and it is good news, what a waste of Mon- Thursday that was! If I get the results and it’s bad news – well I still have wasted Mon-Thurs when I could have been in ignorant bliss not knowing I had this disease—and guess what? I am still going to have to start doing what I need to do, to make myself healthy again starting Friday. Worrying did not change anything.
- Worrying is like a rocking horse, it gives you something to do, but it doesn’t get you anywhere.